I've been thinking about home a lot lately. I was going to do something rash and come back early. But I decided against it. I can use this time (and who know when it will come again). Though, I am anxious to get back to my life and start things up in L.A.
But, oh, I haven't exercised in just about two weeks. I feel horrible. And I know it's going to take a while to get back to the place I was before.
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Pusan, Korea Sunday Nov. 29th
Somewhere along the way I decided inside that no matter how good my life was it was never going to measure up to some other life. Since I've noticed this about myself I've been trying to deprogram this pattern in my mind. I'm sure it comes from the low self-esteem I've suffered from growing up.
I have a good life. No one can take away my accomplishments and the hopes and dreams I have. No one can live my life for me either. Imagining isn't living and my life is not a movie I can simply watch happen. My life has meaning and significance but no one can give these things to me.