I know I have mental limits. I'm not talking about academics but athletics. It used to be that I was afraid of the pain so I wouldn't push myself as hard. Now it's something different. Some part of me doesn't want to be great. Some part of me doesn't want to be the best at what I attempt. I think I've lost the competitive spirit. I don't have a burning desire to push myself to my limits. I feel like I'm living a life of quiet desperation. I'm asking myself why I don't care and what I can do about it. Some part of me has given up. How can I get that part back again?

I know I can beat Morgan if I really drive myself hard. But I don't and afterward I feel disappointed. I know I could have done better. How do I defeat the temptation to quit in my heart and mind when it arrives? No matter what happens I have to beat it. It's vital to everything in the rest of my life, for the rest of my life.

(No more settling for second. No more taking to easy route. No more giving up half way. No more half done tasks.)

No more selfishness and self pity.

It's time to dream again.

Where is my passion?

(I can have joy in the midst of struggle)

I will be joyful in the midst of my struggle.

I am disciplined.

I will no longer quench my spirit.